Wednesday, November 03, 2004

clancy, dondon, lolo cito and vincent

Consolation springs from sources deeper far than deepest suffering.
-William Wordsworth

my condolences to mama lips and her husband, CLANCY's family..the AA pipol will always be here for you..
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i lost my friend DON DON last week. he had a heart attack at the age of 23. i will surely miss him..
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i miss TATA so much...(lolo cito) i cried the other night when i saw his picture...i remember the day he died and i has in fontana having fun with my friends... i still hate myself for not being there to see him...
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someone used to tell me that the first time you fALL inlove,it changes your life forever,and no matter how hard you try, the feeling never goes away...VINCENT, my first boyfriend, died 4years ago. i still think about him once in a while..i miss him a lot.

Pain—has an Element of Blank—
It cannot recollect
When it began—or if there were
A time when it was not—
-Emily Dickinson

Perhaps a scene that illustrates this painful, mind-numbing state is from "Sleepless in Seattle." Tom Hanks' character describes the days following the death of his wife, reliving those feelings as he is interviewed on the phone. He states " I had to remind myself to breathe." Equally descriptive are the words of Pink Floyd. In this stage of the grief process, as part of the body's natural protective response to loss, a person may become "comfortably numb." I can remember times when in the early stages of grief, listening to this music and these lyrics and going numb.


There is no pain you are receding
A distant ship, smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.
When I was a child I had a fever
My hands felt just like two balloons.
Now I've got that feeling once again
I can't explain you would not understand
This is not how I am.
I have become comfortably numb.

Pink Floyd
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what is darkness but the absence of light? if we never knew the sun, would we be content with the night?

now i realize that in my life, there will always be tension, between secrecy and openess, between anonimity and recognition. my challenge is to reconcile the darkness of my past and the light of my present,to strike a balance between my striving for excellence and recognizing my inherent worth...

what are fireflies without the darkness to illuminate?

yowch........


anyway...congrats to JOEY. hahaha dude! sana tumagal kayo ni sheryl..naknampotah. whirlwind romance at its best! hahahahhaha. makulay na muli ang mundo mo..nakangiti ka na ulit habang nagtetext..nang-iinggit ka na saming mga walang kalaguyo...namu. hahahaha. remember ung sinabe namin sayo...tama muna kang wahahahahahaah

margret at Wednesday, November 03, 2004

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