Thursday, August 05, 2004

what is love? in tennis.. it's when no one scores a point. interesting enough. considering what do you gain in love? the joys and the warmth. then you get the heartache and the cold brush of lonliness... it equals the other out. you get nowhere. you don't score a point. a chemical reaction made to ensure procreation. you don't need to find those fireworks to say it's love. but you have to at least feel mutual attraction. sometimes it feels like it's all one sided. that i put in so much and i don't want to stop because of how i feel. the way a doting mother wants to give their child everything and in turn it may/may not spoil the child. but a piece of you wants to feel special too. a piece of you wants to feel like you're wanted. and sought after. and worth fighting for. not that epic love that chases you around the world and requires some sort of meeting place overseen by fate. but the kind that says "hey, i need you. you mean the world to me andi won't let you go without a worthwhile fight.... to lose you would kill me a thousand times over." (well not the thousand times over part- but you know what i mean!) i'm so pathetic. i really am. love rips you from the inside out. clawing in your being and tearing you. love channels through you in a fervor of emotion and if it goes unbridled the passion can suck you up. love makes you fly and love makes you curl up in a ball and wish to god that you were dead. and all you want... is that reassuring touch .. to tell you that they feel the same. that what you're going through is pleasure and pain in the same breath. for there is no such thing as all happiness- everyone knows that.


margret at Thursday, August 05, 2004

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